Thursday, April 14, 2011

HERO PROFILE #68: Iron Lamb

Operates out of: Zoetermeer, Netherlands

Activities: Patrols pastures of Zoetermeer with a remote controlled robotic sheep to protect sheep from assailants

Equipment: Robotic sheep is equipped with cameras and warning system

Quote: "I felt the sheep needed a protector against humans trying to do bad things to them."

Author's notes: I've been introduced to a lot of unique characters in the world of RLSH, and Iron Lamb of the Netherlands is definitely one of them. Upset by a string of sheep mutilations, the man behind this invention decided it was time to defend the sheep...with an iron hero in their image. You can read more about this straight from the Sheep's mouth in the previous entry, "I AM IRON LAMB."


  1. I like his creativity and the fact that he is standing up against animal abuse. So much if what the RLSH/costumed activists is geared towards helping people that sometimes we forget that other living creatures need protection or their own hero/concerned activist. The guy is not breaking the law and while laws might be proposed to assist his efforts, the wheels of beauracracy sometimes turn VERY slowly, especially if it involves something of minor interest to most people. While they are waiting for politicians to give a damn about the sheep at more might get hurt or killed. I applaud Iron Lamb for taking the initiative and doing so within the constraints of the law.

  2. Is there perhaps a video of the Iron Lamb in action?

  3. Anonymous:

    I have put in a request to Iron Lamb for a video of the Lamb in action. Hopefully we will see something soon, I'll be sure to post it here on the blog as a story update.

  4. Wow. I didn't realize the Iron Lamb was finished....

  5. Damn... ROACH thought that was an untapped market. We might have to scrap our "Petting Zoo of DEATH" plans now.

  6. So while most RLSH go on patrols to protect the well-being of others, he toys around with an RC sheep with a webcam glued to it... To PROTECT SHEEP?? Shit, I'd happily give lamb chops to a homeless guy and call it a more-than fair trade of lives.

  7. I don't have any stats or info on this Malvado, but it is possible animal mutilation is a bigger problem than homelessness in Zoetermeer, Netherlands. I'm guessing crime in general is sort of low there. When's the last time you heard a gangster say he was "straight outta Zoetermeer?"

  8. I still applaud Iron Lambs ingenuity Tea. People give RLSH alot of crap sometimes when they hear the idea of them patrolling; it's almost a given that they are going to get hit with the "vigilante" accusation ( because we know how much their detractors LOVE to drop that label on them). If animal abuse is a serious problem in his region and treated as a crime then more power to Iron Lamb. He's fighting crime and apparently doing it by the book. More power to him.

  9. Freaking Awesome! Robo-Lamb gets my full support!

    Raping sheep is not cool.... I am glad there are cyborg defenders to stop these most heinous crimes.

  10. Thank you all for your comments.

    Crime is a problem in Zoetermeer but most of them are handled good by the police in my city (to give an idea, this year only 2 murders and both are solved). But crimes against animals isn't a very hot topic on the political agenda.

    There is a change coming. We have a party for the welfare of animals in congress (Holland is the only country having this). In Dutch congress there is now talk about a law against ritual slaughter (without anesthetica) of cattle.
    The right-wing parties have decided to follow up on this but I think actually for the wrong reason (ritual slaughter is part of moslim-culture etc.).

    Untill the laws are changed and punishment is raised for the crimes I try to prefend I will do try to help out in my own way.

    I think it is better to prefend than to cure.

    I am working on a mini-documentary, placing it on youtube in the future.
    Mr. Krulos will get a link to it when it's ready.

    Thank you all,

    Iron Lamb

  11. Well spoken Iron Lamb. I don't see why combatting this problem on both fronts; your LEGAL method and the political side can't effect a positive outcome of this issue in a more timely manner. I look forward to seeing the mini-documentary.

  12. This is pretty hard to believe. You provided a picture of your Iron Lamb invention, yet the design is impractical. It has a high centre of gravity with a camera (?) on its right side. Since the legs are so close together and long, it is bound to fall over as soon as it moves and/or every five seconds. The mechanics and physics just don’t add up to your claims. On the topic of the legs, if it could actually work, then it would only work on solid concrete since it is designed to run at a stride. For going through a field, the legs would need to be much farther apart to handle the ever changing terrain.

    Now, I can’t see how it is not a model. The camera off to the side is plastic (you can even see the line from the mold running down the front centre of it, a line which can be seen in most toys). There is not a lens, just a plastic bulge as can be seen with G.I. Joe accessories. Then there are the feet. A model of Iron Man would include circuitry, hoses, wires, and gears into the mold itself since they can’t obviously add in all of the components which make up a certain aspect of the model. For example, take a model car engine; it is one solid piece of plastic, not 100 mini pieces of an actual engine. It is simple. The feet of Iron Lamb are obviously plastic (not really practical; also, why not call it Plastic Lamb) and they have an odd design to them--as if there are hoses leading to boots (jet boots?)...basically, due to the placement and design they are just for show.

    I don’t understand why you expect people to believe you blindly. I believe the Anonymous guy above Lord Malignance was being sardonic. A gasless jetpack and a freeze ray. Ya, sure...You say that Iron Lamb has a built in camera, and you obviously have a computer. You also know how to transfer pictures from your computer to Facebook; well, then why don’t you post your Iron Lamb in action on Facebook or YouTube? I think it’s because it’s one thing to create a model that looks like it does X, Y, and Z, and a whole other thing entirely to actually make it do X, Y, and Z, or even just X, just Y, or just Z.

    I’ve seen Midnite Detective’s impact flash bang grenades in action, Artisteroi’s Blast Boot’s and K-9 robotic dog (a replica he built based off of K-9 from Dr. Who), The Eye’s strobe devices, Dark Wolf’s night vision visor, and Eon’s Powerisers and his armour as it progresses through the various stages of Project Eon--but nothing form Iron Lamb, nothing from the media in your area, nothing. From what I can see, and from common sense, the RLSH community really doesn’t need cosplayers or those who claim grandiose achievements. I’m surprised that the RLSV’s (Agent Beryllium in particular) rolled over without questioning the obvious fallacious aspects of simple mechanics, physics, and physiology of your “invention”. If you believe this, then why not believe that Master Legend is the Metatron or that Tothian is the Archangel Michael? For that matter, why question anyone who claims to have an extrasensory ability or superpower?

    Not to be rude, but why does it seem as if Tea is reaching for stories as of late. There are a lot more deserving people and causes out there. It is odd that there are Heroes in the Night spotlights on those who have done nothing more then find a mask and pose.

    Now, if you go out and patrol the fields by yourself, that is commendable. You are doing a service to your neighbours. You can be a “hero” to your community without pretending to be Tony Stark and flashing pictures of a mutilated Iron Man model in the form of a four legged “monstrosity”. The same can be said for someone who does good, without claiming to be able to fly or be an angel/demon/vampire/whatever. Just be yourself, and leave the toys out of it.

    --J.B. Osborne